I was inspired by AJ Rankin’s “NSMisms” because he was inspired by Tony Morgan’s “Perryisms” and thus “Gilbertisms” was born. Out of all my friends, Matt Gilbert is by far the most unique. Here’s a collection of his most famous phrases:
“I’ll tear in to that like a hobo into a bologna sandwich.”
“That’s the mystic portal of death and destiny”
“That was a social and economic disaster”
“Look at those two guys: Captain Creepy Weirdo and Mervin Ervin Grundfeld”
“Mountain Dew: Sweet nectar of the gods!”
“Oh sweet desert oasis, how I have longed for thee”
“Tragic inevitability my friend. Tragic inevitability”
“I’m gonna get sucked into the vortex of doom!”
“That’s aggregious!”
“That could gag a maggot”
“That’s a big tater”
“He’s a grown man” (referring to a good athlete)
“They’re terrible! ” (the 2nd word comes with a very high pitch)
“Bootleg!”
“Wingler is everywhere”
“That guy has the mustache of authority”
“He was given him the biz” (referring to someone doing anything bad to someone else)
“Back down the boom-boom” (referring to his own basketball style)
“PPPBBBBTTTTTHHH!”
And, of course, there are several that are too inappropriate for this blog.









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January 12, 2009 at 12:13 pm
Sarah Davis
i appreciate these quotes sooo much! I laughed so hard i couldnt stop crying! This really made my day!!!
January 12, 2009 at 5:42 pm
Sarah
Scary thing is, I heard him in my head saying these as I read. But Kevin! You left out the most crucial gilbertism, which my dad implanted in his head, so we’ll just call it a wallbertism:
THAT”S COMMUNISM!!!!!!!!!!!!