I’m sick of negativity. It’s everywhere. Criticism and cynicism sometimes get a free pass because those that spew it say “I’m just being honest”. Honesty is good, right? Yes but the Bible goes further. It instructs us to speak the truth in love. “But I do love that person I’m degrading”. Maybe, but the question is are you speaking in love? Another excuse: “I will say it to their face”. I believe you, but will it hurt them? Because if you will say something to someone’s face knowing it will hurt them….you’re a jerk. You’ve got darkness in your life. I understand the need to confront but it must be done in love and with a genuine desire to help (not to complain). Negative people also claim that they only want the best out of people and can therefore criticize them in the name of “excellence”. The problem is that critics tend to 1) focus on the bad and forget the good 2) criticize constantly, even when it is unwanted 3) fail to recognize that mistakes are a part of the learning process and 4) forget that they make plenty of their own mistakes.
There is a group of people, however, that never get criticized. These people are the ones that never try. They never do anything to stand out. They stay in the safe zone because of, most likely, fear of criticism. It makes you wonder though, if there were less critics would more people step out and try the things that are in their heart? Check out one of my favorite quotes:
“It is not the critic who counts: not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles or where the doer of deeds could have done better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly, who errs and comes up short again and again, because there is no effort without error or shortcoming, but who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, who spends himself for a worthy cause; who, at the best, knows, in the end, the triumph of high achievement, and who, at the worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who knew neither victory nor defeat.” -Theodore Roosevelt
Here’s some good things to think about BEFORE you open your mouth:
What will I accomplish by saying this?
Would I say it directly to that person? (If not, DON’T SAY IT!)
Would it hurt them?
Are you genuinely trying to help them?
Is it really necessary to say these things in the presence of anyone else?